How many of you have seen the shirts that say “FOOD is my favorite F word”? Funny right? I actually do enjoy them and have some seen some pretty great recreations, but I can’t help but think you’re all lying. If there were to be some survey that determined the most used F word, hands down it would be fuck.
I think the majority of us are ashamed to admit how often we say fuck. However I am not the majority of people. I will proudly shout about my love to say FUCK. One of these days I should do some research on how many times I use it in a day. There are so many great uses of the highly sophisticated word (total sarcasm) that sometimes I just get carried away.
The elongated fuck. The one you use in the moment of realization that you forgot your wallet at home. You also didn’t pack a lunch as usual and are already at work, an hour away from home. Or when your mom asks you if you dropped off the bank deposit she asked you to, 2 weeks ago. Yes, we all know this one.
For when someone rubs you the wrong way. Like this morning, driving on the interstate to work, car pulls over into my lane and slams on their brakes. Fuck you man. FUCK YOU. Another one of my favorites is every week when I get a call or a letter from student debt collectors. I ain’t got that kind of money. Fuck you. Leave me alone.
When something unexpected comes up that you probably could have avoided. I forgot about some medical bills I needed to pay. A good chunk of time went by. Then I get a letter informing me their in collections and I need to pay the full balance. FUCK ME. I once had to replace my cars tires two times in a years span, because I didn’t get an alignment after the first set like I was told to. FUCK ME.
FUCK ME SIDEWAYS
Sometimes things will totally shock me or leave me utterly confused. Like when I pull up to fill up my gas tank and gas prices have gone up so much it now costs $10 more to fill my gas tank. Or when I hear my baby daddy is back in town and wants to see my daughter.
FUCK THIS SHIT
When you’re completely over the stupidity of something. Dead end relationships. Adulting and sticking to a budget. A project you’ve been working on won’t turn out how you want it to. You’ve started over five times and put your blood, sweat and tears into it. Throw your hands up. Shake your head. FUCK THIS SHIT.
We’re all guilty. We all say it. Fuck. Don’t be ashamed. Say it proudly. FUCK. FUCK IS OUR FAVORITE F WORD.